Welcome to the most exclusive, most daring, most dangerously delicious garden raid ever attempted by the Woodland Crew. This is not your grandmother’s garden party—this is an all-natural, gourmet-level, survival-of-the-fittest feast, orchestrated by a cast of characters with enough personality to fill a reality show lineup. And now, you can wear the adventure with our 'Wildlife in the Garden' tees.
Milo the Mouse: Small but mighty. An apex predator in the world of strawberries. When he spotted a particularly oversized berry, he saw not an obstacle, but an opportunity. He hauled it home with Herculean effort, where he could enjoy his spoils in solitary splendor, far from the chaos of the Woodland Crew’s gathering.
Billie the Bat: The brooding, tactical genius of the group. He, too, claimed a monstrous strawberry, because he is always prepared. But unlike Milo, Billie made a calculated decision to grace the campfire with his presence. Did he lurk dramatically in the shadows? Absolutely. Did he make strategic, almost cinematic appearances to steal bites of popcorn? Without a doubt. Because a true overachiever doesn’t just snack. He makes it a statement.
Raccoon: A visionary. A strategist. A popcorn prodigy. He spent his day liberating corn from a nearby field, ensuring the group had the finest campfire snack. Was it legally acquired? Let’s just say possession is nine-tenths of the law.
Big Bear: The gentle, food-loving patriarch of the crew. He gathered berries, veggies, and goodwill—then immediately fell into a deep, snore-worthy nap by the fire. Because when you contribute to society, you deserve rest. And snacks. But mostly rest.
Grumpy Owl: The reluctant chef. The culinary cynic. Scowling, as usual, but still elevating the feast with a curated selection of fine herbs. He won’t admit it, but he takes deep, almost painful pride in his gourmet contributions. And the Crew knows better than to question his exquisite taste.
Rabbit: A wildcard. A scatterbrain. But lately? A seeker of balance. Between bursts of untamed energy, he’s been practicing meditation. Which means his carrot-gathering was performed with intention, mindfulness, and only one minor detour chasing a butterfly. Progress.
Squirrel: The tomato mogul. He arrived at the feast with an overabundance of tomatoes, insisting they were the perfect pairing for literally everything. Nobody argued, mostly because they feared his deep and borderline obsessive passion for the fruit.
Frog: A dapper soul. A self-proclaimed connoisseur of all things refined. He selected only the most sublime sugar snap peas, because his taste is impeccable. The rest of the group finds his almost laughable snobbery rather charming.
Sage the Deer: The undisputed queen of woodland hospitality. If there were an award for 'Most Likely to Host a Picture-Perfect Garden Party,' she’d win every time. Everything she touches is aesthetically flawless and seasonally appropriate. She curated an elegant selection of raspberries and blackberries, because presentation matters.
Willow the Fox: A foraging virtuoso with the resourcefulness of a time-traveling herbalist and the charm of someone who could talk her way out of (or into) anything. A renaissance fox with both a sharp wit and a keen eye for quality. She and Sage worked together to ensure the feast met both rustic and refined standards.
Crow: A clever opportunist. A hustler with an eye for shiny things—and a talent for negotiation. He didn’t just collect berries, he made deals, pulled favors, and somehow ended up with the best selection without ever touching a thorn. The others don’t ask questions.
Little Bear: The apple baron. He filled his basket to the brim with crisp, sweet apples, cementing his reputation as a reliable, but slightly sticky, contributor.
Together, the Woodland Crew transformed their bounty into a feast of epic proportions. The 'Wildlife in the Garden' tee immortalizes their thrilling, ridiculous, and surprisingly well-orchestrated adventure. If you’ve ever felt like a tiny but mighty Milo, a brooding but brilliant Billie, or a popcorn-driven Raccoon, this shirt is for you.
Wear it, and join the greatest woodland feast of all time. (Just watch out for Frog’s unsolicited opinions on proper vegetable pairings.)
